By Abby Lass
1) You refer to your teacher solely as “Madame”
Nothing else necessary.
2) French rap and hip-hop may be angsty, but it’s also amazing and catchy
Stay fab, Stromae.
3) You will never be able to conjugate things in the subjunctive when it really matters
Doesn’t matter how many times you’ve reviewed it, it’s not going to make it’s way into your in-class essay.
4) Also what even is the passé simple?
Could not tell you.
5) The symbolism in French movies/books/other forms of media will more likely than not go way over your head
Sorry, can you just explain it to me like four more times? And maybe not in French?
6) Thursday night field trips with your class are an excellent bonding experience
Anyone else want to come see a French existentialist comedy on a Thursday night with me? It’s only an hour each way!
7) French absurdists need to calm down a little
Alright, alright we get it– society is terrible and life means nothing. Anything else you want us to know?
8) English versions of your textbook/outside readings are a godsend
So that’s what happened in that chapter! Would never have understood otherwise.
9) Québécois French is not real French
However, Québécois sketch comedy is on point.
10) Crêpe Day = Best Day
And it’s obviously the reason you started taking French in the first place.