8 Things No One Ever Really Teaches You

Photo by Rhea Dudani

By Abby Lass and Deana Korsunsky

1) How to use a graphing calculator

Calculus would probably be a very different experience if someone would bother to explain some buttons.

2) How to do taxes

It’s all fun and games until you accidentally commit tax fraud.

3) How to use your dishwasher

I’m not lazy– I just don’t think the value of me doing chores is worth the havoc that will occur as a result of me trying to operate this piece of machinery.

4) How to know which relative is how many times removed

“My second cousin thrice removed” is not an acceptable answer.

5) How to apply for financial aid

No, the 30 page pdf is not useful.

6) How to find internships

Me when adults judge me for not having a real job this summer.

7) How to write professional emails

Is there a middle ground between sounding like a robot and a whiny infant because if so I have not found it yet.

8) How to properly react when people are singing “Happy Birthday” to you

Seriously, why is there not a standard protocol for this yet that doesn’t leave us smiling awkwardly for far too long?