Things that Might Happen after This Election

Graphic by Melanie Egan

By Eddie Fleming

Pro Procrastinator

If Trump Wins

  1. Obesity will be made illegal for women
  2. Spray tans will become mandatory
  3. There will be three first ladies
  4. The Canadian population will increase

If Hillary Wins

  1. Ken Bone will be in her cabinet
  2. Pantsuits will become the public dress code
  3. Private email servers will be banned
  4. The Canadian population will rise

If Jill Stein Wins

  1. Dinosaurs will no longer be extinct
  2. The Canadian population will rise

If Gary Johnson Wins

  1. National Aleppo awareness day
  2. The Canadian population will rise

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