By Lauren Forrow
One of my least successful moments as a student at Newton South High School was when I fell in the swamp in Cold Spring Park.
I was working on a short film with a few classmates. It was our final project for Film Studies for the year. In the script, I had to walk along a log to cross a stream. We didn’t have a stream per se, but we did find a relatively sturdy fallen tree that crossed part of the swamp. Relatively sturdy. Halfway across, the tree got noticeably thinner. I turned back, because I knew if I kept going it wouldn’t end well. When I had two steps left until solid ground, I let out a sigh of relief. I was fine. That was, of course, when it all went to hell. I didn’t even bother to reach out when I fell, because the only branches nearby were essentially twigs. Then I was in the swamp. I could feel it soaking through my jeans. I was up to my elbows in muck, almost horizontal. All I wanted in that moment was to take a shower.
If I have learned one thing in my time at Newton South, it’s that when they ask you on the PSATs if you want to opt-in to receiving college mail, the answer is no.
The more important lesson I’ve learned, though, is the importance of success. I think we can all relate to that. If there is anything that the culture of this school teaches us, it is that the most important thing in life is to be successful. And, as Newton South students, we are all expected to find success. That’s a lot of pressure, and that pressure can be terrible. It can be devastating.
But what I’m here to say is this: everyone in this room has experienced success in the past, is experiencing success right now, and will experience success in the future. Because success is about achieving your dreams.
The thing about dreams is that they don’t need to be enormous. As a class we have a billion dreams, and some of them are giant and some of them are tiny and what matters is that we strive for them. I know at least one person who dreamed that she’d make it to nationals for speech—and she did. I know another person who dreamed that one day she’d finish her shampoo and conditioner bottles at the same time—and she did. South Senate lowered the parking pass fee this year—shout out to Jack Lovett—that was definitely a dream of mine. While it’s amazing to achieve our more ambitious dreams, it is crucial not to write off the smaller successes we experience in our lives.
A few days ago I asked my friend what makes her feel successful. Without missing a beat, she said, “When people laugh at my crappy jokes.” Not “I’m going to a great school”, which she is, or “I’m a crazy talented artist”, which she also is—no, my friend feels successful when she makes people laugh. Because in life, the little successes are what keep us all going. Like when you run into someone and they’re happy to see you; or you manage to bring in all the groceries from the car in one trip; or you finally cross that last thing off your to-do list; or you do better on a test than you’d expected; or you high five someone and you just nail it.
Those aren’t the things people usually think of when they think of success, especially not at South. At South, I’ve found that success often means “going to an Ivy” or “will be a celebrity one day” or “is going to make a lot of money”. And those are successes, they are, but they’re not the only kind. The small triumphs we experience every day are just as valid and just as important as the ones we wait a lifetime for, maybe even more so. Too often we overlook how powerful those little accomplishments are. We focus on our failures, what didn’t happen, what we didn’t achieve, and we under-appreciate the impact the small things have on our lives. The big successes would never happen without them.
Lately, when I’ve looked back on my time at Newton South, I’ve thought about the time I fell in the hallway/Wheeler staircase, the colleges I didn’t get into, and how I felt when I was elbow-deep in that swamp with the camera still rolling. But those aren’t the moments I should be focusing on. I should be remembering all the people who helped me pick up my books, the colleges I did get into, and how I felt when I went back to filming—right after I showered, of course. I was a lot more successful than I give myself credit for.
We have all experienced failures, both trivial and monumental. When we forgot to bring in our project the day it was due, or we slept through our alarm, or we said something we regretted. But if we’re going to focus on those, we owe it to ourselves to also focus on our successes—even and especially the trivial ones.
I hope that when you look back on your days at Newton South, you highlight the positives. Because I know you were successful. After all, we’re all sitting here today.
Congratulations Class of 2014.
I can’t wait to watch you all find success in the future, wherever it may be.
Thank you.
