By Liza Hochberg and Caraline Pham
Pro Procrastinators
Horoscopes:
Aires (Born between March 21 – April 19): This week, you need to hakuna your matatas. It’s a stressful time of the year and there is no need to stress about APs, SATs, ACTs, or even subject tests. You should have used the homework-free weekend to relax, chilled by Crystal Lake and maybe nommed on some Tango Mango.
Taurus (Born between April 20 – May 20): This week may be overwhelming with many group projects. Don’t cling to your own ideas. Varied input can have a favorable outcome. You should have used the homework-free weekend to relax, chilled by Crystal Lake with some friends and maybe nommed on some Tango Mango.
Gemini (Born between May 21 – June 20): Use your honesty to help you in assassins or school work. You will surely find some unexpected allies this week. Though you may not know it, you used the homework-free weekend to have some heart-to-heart conversations at Crystal Lake and perhaps nommed on some Tango Mango.
Cancer (Born between June 21 – July 22): Make sure to wear your blue and orange. Lions pride is very important this week; it will bring you to new places in the school. Definitely help out a freshman; maybe bring them to Crystal Lake this homework-filled weekend and nom on some Tango Mango together.
Leo (Born between July 23 – August 22): Keep doing you. This is a good week to just continue. Perhaps you’ve been eating Tango at Crystal Lake during the homework-free weekend: do that more.
Virgo (Born between August 23 – September 22): Now is your time to shine and show your support. You should go to Senior Night and maybe you will meet a special someone there with whom you can find joy at Crystal Lake as you nom on some Tango.
Libra (Born between September 23 – October 22): Don’t be afraid to break up a fight in front of the library’s new mural. You may make a new friend this week that you can bring to Crystal Lake and eat Tango with.
Scorpio (Born between October 23 – November 21): There is no need to be mad at your ex. You can find a new love this weekend at Crystal Lake… while eating Tango Mango.
Sagittarius (Born between November 22 – December 21): This week might be a good week to break up with your significant other. You really should just relax and focus on yourself this week. If you don’t feel comfortable without your significant other, then you should go on a date this weekend to Tango Mango, and then Crystal Lake.
Capricorn (Born between December 22 – January 19): Become accustomed to other people’s feelings. Perhaps being the project leader will lead you to success. Throwing people under the bus for your own benefit is only acceptable if you buy them Tango Mango this weekend and bring them to Crystal Lake.
Aquarius (Born between January 20 – February 18): This week, someone might try to ask you to copy their homework – don’t do it. You have a strong sense that you must abide by. To celebrate staying true to yourself, treat yourself to a burrito from Tango Mango while you eat it by Crystal Lake.
Pisces (Born Between February 19 – March 20): Find someone who lets you be you. Speak up for yourself. Ask a question in class. Order yourself a burrito at Tango Mango and eat it at Crystal Lake where you may contemplate your own personality.
